Soothing the pain of an unfortunate tumble

For the first time since reaching my three score and ten I felt like a vulnerable older person last Thursday, rapidly accelerated by a dramatic head-long fall down the steps of a town centre bank in Ellon, right out into the busy street.

Tuesday, 8th April 2014, 8:00 am

Luckily for me there was no traffic within 10 yards of my fall, though there were plenty of willing hands to help me to my feet within seconds. I was very grateful to them, and just hope I was gracious enough to thank them at the time.

In truth I can’t recall much of what went on, though I do have a distant memory of one passer-by suggesting the incident would make a good story for the local papers.

Thank you madam for your observations, not much appreciated at the time, but a situation which seemed quite funny many hours later when I was safely home, nursing a dram to ease the pain and lessen the shock.

What was not funny was being unable to get a doctor’s appointment the following morning when I felt my shoulder and leg needed a reassuring once over, even if it had been one of the friendly, efficient nurses who grace the Ellon Centre rather than a doctor.

It is no big deal, but begs the question as to just what you have to do to merit the attention of the medical profession.

Talking of nurses, I have always wondered why it is the fair sex who are in the majority in the assembled ranks of the profession, when they can be tough, hard cookies who seem to lack the necessary compassion that we mere males crave, even demand.

I certainly didn’t get much sympathy from my better half who seemed to assume it had all been my fault, which I have to admit it was. I certainly will not be apportioning any blame to the High Street bank down whose steps I so inelegantly tumbled in a rush to get to my next appointment.

Ironically I was in a hurry to catch the 65 bus. Yes, the very same one that I have been campaigning to keep on the streets of Ellon.

On a completely different tack I really can’t see what all the fuss is about in respect of golf clubs opening their membership to both ladies and gents. We all know it is wrong to discriminate against women, but then we should be equally aware that golf clubs are generally behind the times, living in their own little world of opinion and bias.

But instead of blaming chauvinist males, the same women who want parity - and generally have in most clubs, they should face up to the fact they have been happy to play along with the silly games male golfers want to play.

Most clubs have enlightened policies, apart from those stuffy establishments who will fight to retain male dominance. I certainly would not wish to be a member of either Muirfield or Troon who have yet to open their doors to women, not that in my present state of health I would be able to swing a club.